Rev. McKinley L. Sims, M.Div.

Here’s a truth about me: I’ve always struggled with anger. I’m very competitive by nature, and this strength helped me to excel on the sports field as undersized and underwhelming quarterback and point guard. My anger sometimes gave me superhuman strength and speed, at least that’s how I remember it. The weakness of it is of course that anger can get out of control and become rage that just blinds you to everything going on. Anger is not attractive, I found out. To make a long story short, I shut off my outward presenting anger in high school and vowed to never come back to it, for fear of it’s potential to control me and my potential to hurt others while under its control. I was afraid, and I ran from it. I didn’t feel anger for years.

I thought.

Turns out I did feel anger, I just didn’t show it. I was “unflappable.” I was “even-keeled.” I didn’t ever let my anger show on my face. It had the strength of making me a great leader and a great listener, a rock for others to vent to. I was great in a crisis. I still am, actually. The weakness is that that anger didn’t cease to exist, it just changed form. It became passive-aggression. It showed up in sly smiles and condescending tones. It went unacknowledged and unused, and that made it dangerous.

I’ve been working on reclaiming anger as part of my full self this past year. On Sunday, when I finally got around to fully grasping the news of the president’s administration’s use of child detention centers, I had a strange feeling in my heart and in my stomach.

I was angry. I was furious. I was mad.

I didn’t react perfectly. I got into it on facebook with family members and strangers. I rage tweeted. I read articles obsessively, reinforcing my anger. It circulated and reflected like a firestorm in an enclosed space, taking up all the oxygen and threatening to explode. It’s okay, I thought. It’s okay to be mad. It’s okay to be angry. Let that guide you to the center: What’s going to make a difference? Sure, arguing on facebook makes me feel better, but it’s not going to produce anything. That’s spiritual masturbation (feels good, nothing born).

So what to do?

Call. Donate. Organize. Protest. Run for office. Boycott.

Be angry. Feel angry. But don’t let it end there. Don’t get consumed by the anger. Don’t let it burn up your oxygen and leave you breathless and spiritless. Call out your family members, but don’t let them ruin your day. Our days don’t end in cages separated from our loves.

Be outraged, but that’s not a strategy all by itself. Find something to do that challenges your comfort. For me, that’s arguing on facebook with grace and courage, and then donating money and committing to canvas politically and learn as much as I can about the issues in our world. That’s the first step. Not the last. The journey is long, and our anger has the potential to help spur us to be the change in the world if we use it rightly. May that be so.